It seems that the Bankers are still lining their pockets and this time they have rowed in regulators and law makers from the House of Lords.
Lord Levene, the chairman of the Lloyds insurance market, is to create a new high street bank to be floated on AIM and initially funded by £50m from City institutions including Invesco and F&C. The bank will then issue shares to gain more funds and expand rapidly to acquire other businesses including Northern Rock’s state-owned “good bank”. Not the bad one, mind you, that is to be left for the tax payer.
I heard Lord Levene on the radio a week or so ago who said that he considered that the High Street banking business could do very well but an article in The Independent newspaper quotes Neil Saunders, of the DataMonitor consultancy, as saying “All banks face apathy in terms of switching behaviour….It takes an awful lot to get people to change bank.”
No problem, Lord Levene has thought of that and plans to simply buy up the 600 branches that Lloyds Banking Group had been ordered to sell following its state rescue.
Lord Levin obviously spotted the chance to make some money as did half the regulators and House of Lords.
One has to wonder who it was who decided that Lloyds should be ordered to sell the 600 branches and whether any of those involved in Lord Levine’s new bank had any involvement such as the “non-executive directors” of the new bank Sir David Walker (former official of the Treasury and Bank of England and deputy chairman of Lloyds bank), Lord McFall (chaired the House of Commons’ inquiry into the banking crisis) or Charlie McCreevy (former EU commissioner). Presumably these honourable men merely spotted a chance which came about coincientally following thier decision to force Lloyds to sell its branches. One can imagine them around the board room able: “Buy up the 600 branches? By Jove, never thought of that!”
The article in The Independent says that “executives will be appointed after the flotation”. It seems odd to wait until after the flotation to appoint executives but perhaps the new bank will be such a money spinner that they could employ any old fool to run it. If past performance is any indicator of future results then they probably will though it is not known if Sir Fred is still available.
Lovely Jubbly as del boy would say.







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Tags: bastard, bum, Cunt, foul mouth, fuck, google, Jeremy Paxman, Julie Burchill, literature, newsnight, Ngram Viewer, slang, stand up comedy, swearing, The Independent, tits, wanker
So we’re off again. This time it’s Jeremy Paxman falling into the dreaded cunt trap when saying cuts, cuts, cuts on Newsnight.
While watching one of these stand up comedy programs a week or so ago it seemed to me that the comedians seemed desperate to prove their foul mouth credentials. In fact, they were not even that foul mouthed, but merely sprinkled their rhetoric with the word “fucking”. Don’t get me wrong I have no aversion to fucking swearing but I was reminded of a friend from my youth who used to use the word “fucking” prior to every noun. In his eyes many people were “fucking cunts” but one day he became so excited that he referred to someone as a FUCKING fucking cunt. I still find this amusing today because he’d merged the term fucking cunt into a single “ngram” so that the term still needed an additional adjective to kick it off.
Flicking through the Independent web site the other day I stumbled upon a Julie Burchill article entitled Say goodbye to the Enlightenment. We are living in the age of goatsuckers
I admit that I found the article virtually unreadably. It could have been that I was tired but I really could not be bothered to go back and reread it. I do recall the following phrase “….from teenage girls who are free to fuck when and who they want for the first time in history….”.
The word fuck drew my attention. I don’t think that it was because of any obscene connotations but because of the causal use of slang in a main stream newspaper. Not that I have anything to boast about in this regard.
Interestingly Google Ngram viewer shows that, as far as literature is concerned, the term cunt has been growing in popularity since the 1960s roughly following the popularity curve of tits and wanker. Bastard has long been popular and bum has been growing in popularity but the real star performer here is the word fuck. Fuck has shot up in popularity and is now more used even than bastard. This is comforting as it is in accord with my own experience of TV stand up comedy shows. Odd then that serious news presenters seemed to have become obsessed with cunts.
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